Showing posts with label Advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Advice. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Get Back Your Love In 3 Easy Steps

OK you're broken up because you've lost the love of your life and now you want them back.  But is it possible to get back your love?  If so, then how?  Let me show you...

I know it's a cliche, but it's true: breaking up is hard to do.  That's why people almost always do the wrong thing when they are going through a breakup.  They are hurt, angry and scared and they just react.  And that is where the trouble starts.

If you want to get back with your love you need to follow a few simple tips.  Following these tips won't always be easy but you'll have a much better chance of getting back together with your ex then you would if you don't follow them. 

1) Don't suffocate them.  Even though it's tough to keep your distance that is exactly what you have to do. Even when you want to scream at them that  they are  being stupid and they're throwing away a wonderful relationship you need to hold that in. 

You need to give your ex time to miss you. If you make them angry by pursuing them relentlessly you will lose them forever.  And this is exactly what most people do. 

2) Don't spend too much time worrying about them, concentrate on you.  Now would be a great time for you to take stock of you.  Decide what traits you have that might have contributed to the relationship falling apart and try to fix them. 

Remember, you aren't fixing them to get your ex back, you are fixing them because they need to be fixed and  you want to be the best person you can be. 

No matter what happens with your ex, whether you get back together with them or not, if you take this important step now you will grow as a person and that can only make your future relationships much better. 

3)  At some point the two of you will need to talk.  Don't do this right away even though that's what you'll want to do.  You both need time to let things settle down otherwise any conversation you have is likely to end up with crying, or screaming, or both.

Once a little time has gone by you both can realize that you miss each other and hopefully have an honest conversation about what each of you is feeling and where you'd like to go from that point on. 

Just remember this isn't about proving that you're right and they're wrong.  It's about trying to honestly evaluate and understand each other's point of view.  That is the only way you can build a solid relationship.

Following these 3 seemingly simple steps can really help you  get back your love.  It's not going to be easy but it's the only way to reconcile and build something strong for the future.
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Monday, October 12, 2009

I Miss My Ex Boyfriend

After you break up with a guy, there is a period of loneliness.  Not only are you missing the time that you spent with him, but there is also a piece of your heart that walked out the door when he did.  If you are saying “I miss my ex boyfriend,” here are some ways to get past the feeling.

There are two steps to getting over an ex.  The first is to bring closure to the relationship and the second is to start on the next phase of your life.

Closure is the psychological term for ending a phase of one's life.  There are many things you can do to stop saying "I miss my ex boyfriend".

First of all, you should determine that he doesn't want you back.  As long as you think that there is a chance you can get back together, you will not begin to heal.  

To that end, exchange all of the physical possessions you have.  Don't keep his toothbrush in your bathroom or hold on to his leather jacket.  If you have left clothes or other possessions at his house, pick them up.  

If either of you owes the other money, pay it back as soon as possible.  

Don't contact him and don't let him contact you.  Perhaps you can be friends in the future, but right now, you need time to separate your emotional lives.  If you give in and answer his phone calls, emails, or texts, you are just letting a wound fester.

If you find yourself saying "I miss my ex boyfriend", sit down and write about it.  Write a letter to him sharing your feelings about the relationship and the break up.  But don't send it to him.  Throw it away, or even better, burn it.  This will help you bring closure to the relationship.

After you've gotten over the initial hurt of the break up, start putting yourself out there again.  It might feel awkward at first, but you are going to have to face life as a single person sometime.  The sooner you get back on the scene, the sooner you will meet someone new.

If your ex took up a big part of your life, you will want to find new past times.  This may mean reconnecting with your girlfriends.  Or, it may mean going out and finding new friends.

One of the best ways to fill the space an old boyfriend took up is to start something new.  Join a class or a co-ed sports team.  See if your local book store has a monthly book club.  Start going to church again.  

While it may be hard to get started on the social scene again, you will find that you miss your ex boyfriend much less when you are engaged in activities you enjoy.

When you have the opportunity to, start dating again.  Even if the first guy isn't someone you can see spending the rest of your life with, accept his invitation to dinner or the movies.  As you get back into the routine of dating, you will be able to find a man who can appreciate and love you.

Whenever you hear yourself thinking 'I miss my ex boyfriend', do something that either brings closure to the relationship or propels you to move forward in your life. 

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Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Relationships - Break Up To Make Up

This is your guide: Relationships - Break Up to Make Up.  The break up may be just the first stage in getting back together with an ex.

If you had been dating for any length of time, you and your ex had a lot invested in the relationship.  You obviously loved and cared for each other.  But something went wrong and one of you decided to call it quits.  How you handle the relationship break up may have a lot to do with whether you can ever make up.

If you are the one initiating the break up, try to do it with love and compassion.  Whether you are truly calling it quits or just wanting a time out, remember that this is a person who has been important to you and you have a responsibility to take his or her feelings into account.

It's generally best to tell the person that you want to break up in a public place.  That's because people are less likely to embarrass themselves if others are around.  Also, don't draw the break up out.  Just say your piece and leave.

Once you have broken up, leave the channels of communication open.  Be there for your ex when he or she needs you.  

Don't play games with your ex.  Some people suggest dating their best friend or flaunting a new date on your ex, but consider that if you ever make up, these things are going to haunt your new relationship.

If you have found that you want to get back together with your ex, consider the following:

· Tell them that you are interested
· Be interesting yourself - take up new activities and make new friends
· Try a new look - whether it is a new hair style or simply updating your grooming, your ex will notice.

Suggest that you meet your ex for lunch or some other non-romantic activity.  During this time, you can bring up the positive memories you shared.  You can also emphasize any changes you have made in your life.

If your ex gives you any indication that he or she is willing to give it a second try, don't assume that you can start right back where you left off.  Woo your boyfriend or girlfriend.  Go out on romantic dates.  Start by holding hands, not jumping into the sack.  

Also, give your relationship time to heal from the break up.  Don't assume that your ex's feelings weren't hurt by the cooling off period.

Continue improving yourself.  Don't fall into bad habits just because you've got your ex back.  Constantly strive to be the best boyfriend or girlfriend you can be.

That's your guide to Relationships - Break up to Make up.

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Monday, October 5, 2009

I Miss My Ex Girlfriend

When you find yourself saying "I miss my ex girlfriend", you need to find ways to move forward with your life.  No matter how bad the break up was, there is life after your ex.  Finding your way through the depression that follows the end of the relationship can be hard.  That's why you need to take concrete actions to move forward.

First of all, you need to work on bringing closure to the relationship.  Closure is the process by which you move on from a situation.  While you may find specific situations in which you say, "I miss my ex girlfriend", you will not be in this state all of the time.

Begin by definitively saying that the relationship is over.  As long as you think there is a chance that you can get your ex back, you will not be able to move on.  Healing begins with putting an end to the relationship.

Next, you need to physically close the relationship.  You do that by exchanging all of the possessions in the other's care.  Give her back the toothbrush and curling iron she kept at your house and ask her for the sweat shirt that she had borrowed for the long term.  If you owed each other money, settle up.

Once you have your possessions back, give yourself some physical space.  While you may want to remain friends with your ex in the long run, staying away in the short term will facilitate healing.  Don't call, text, or email each other.  If she tries to contact you, screen her out.  

And, don't show up at places she is likely to be.  You don't want to give her any opening to get under your skin.  Seeing her with another guy so soon will just prompt feelings of "I miss my ex girlfriend" all over again.

You may even need to change some of your social habits.  If you go to a small church, you might want to consider changing places of worship at least in the short term.  You may have to pick a new favorite bar or hang out as well.

When you start going new places, you will inevitably meet new people.  Some of these people will be female.  These new women are good prospects for dates.

While it may seem right now that you'll never want to date another woman, the truth is that the sooner you get back on the dating scene, the sooner you will begin to heal.

It may not be enough to just be available though.  Consider actively seeking out women.  Take a class at the local university's extension program.  Join a co-ed softball team.  Take up a new hobby.  All of these strategies will allow you to start meeting new women.

If a woman intrigues you, ask her out even if you can't picture yourself in a long term relationship with her.  A date is just a fun social experience, not a commitment.

Pretty soon, you won't be saying "I miss my ex girlfriend" nearly as frequently.  You will have moved on with your life.  

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Thursday, October 1, 2009

Stop My Divorce

Divorces are at an all time high.  Sometimes it seems that it's easier to get a divorce than to get married. 

People get hurt in divorce.  The parties are forever scarred.  Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt.  Knowing this, you may be wondering "How do I stop my divorce?"

There are three steps to stopping a divorce.  

The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you've changed does not mean you really have changed.  If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it's not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.

If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways.  It is not enough to tell your partner that you're not stepping out anymore.  You will have to take concrete actions.  As an example, you may need to allow your partner to monitor your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis.  If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.

Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship.  For instance, if the wife's spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance.  If the husband's work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what.  At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life?  If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes.  But don't just give lip service to them.  Actions speak louder than words.

The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce.  Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage.  Telling your partner, "but I love you" in the heat of an argument will not win you any points.  When you say "I love you" at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say "I love you, BUT"  this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.

Use the powerful I love you message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument.  

You can't use logic or guilt to change your partner's mind.  Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument.  If you feel you must win, then you will lose.   

Finally, don't think that you can win an argument.  Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to prove they are right and their partner is wrong.  This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it's sure to fail.  Instead of arguing, solve the problem.  If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back.  

Are you wondering how to stop my divorce?  Start by following the stop my divorce advice I've laid out in this article.



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Wednesday, September 30, 2009

How To Get Your Ex GF Back Quickly

For anyone that has dabbled in the world of giving relationship advice, the title will actually be a bit of a red herring.  The main reason for this is that the vast majority of successful relationships that re-engage after a breakup are actually going to be relationships that do it very quickly after the initial breakup occurs.  While there are others where the two participants can get back together months or even years after breaking up, usually this is not how things work in the real world.

So, want to know how to get your ex GF back quickly?  Well, the first thing that you need to figure out is whether there is actually a future in that relationship.  If it turns out that there is no future to the relationship, you should start focusing on other goals.  Try to meet new people and push your ex-lover out of your life.  It is much healthier to pursue other options than to try and reignite a relationship that you know will take you nowhere.

If, on the other hand, you feel strongly that getting your girlfriend back can indeed lead to a strong and long relationship, there is no harm in giving it a try.  In this situation, a lot of people make the mistake by taking the direct approach.  They go right up to the girl and ask them if they are interested in starting things up again.  This may work with certain guys, but it is a method that is doomed to failure with just about every ex-girlfriend in the world today.

So what should you do instead?  Well, if you want to do things properly, you need to have your ex see you living a good life.  You need to attend the same social events as they do and then engage them in casual conversation there.  You can even bring a casual date to the events just to show that you are not hung up on trying to get your ex back completely.  The appearance of having moved on is a big thing in these situations because it can make your ex jealous and that in turn can potentially lead to them realizing that they still have feelings for you.

If you want to know how to get your ex GF back quickly, this is essentially the information you're looking for in a nutshell.  Jealously and the realization of feelings can lead your ex to the conclusion that they still want to have you in their life and to be in yours.  This is the only way that you are going to be able to achieve a healthy relationship with your ex.  Unless they realize right here and right now that they still want to share their life with you, this is going to be doomed from the start.

Where you go from that point is up to you.  Also, it is important to realize that your ex might see you and be fine with it, having already moved on herself.  So one way or another, this method will tell you exactly where you and your ex stand.
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Monday, September 28, 2009

How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back - A Sure Fire Method

If you are someone that has had to suffer the sting of getting dumped by a boyfriend, you can trust that there are many around the world that feel your pain.  Many right now are wondering exactly the same thing that you are. 

If you want to know how to get your ex boyfriend back, there is one thing that you must understand right now.  While you might definitely be able to get your lover back after time spent apart, what you need to realize right now is that there might be a chance that it never happens.  There are many old clichés about love, but a lot of them do apply to situations where people have had love denied to them by someone that used to be integral to their lives.  The best thing that you can do for your life is prepare yourself to move on if it turns out that your ex is gone for good.  This is the healthiest solution for anyone of any gender in the situation of pursuing an ex.

If you're determined to have your ex back and understand the risks mentioned above, here are some things that you can do in order to make that work.

For starters, the thing you must not do if you want to properly execute the plan is pester your ex.  You wanted to know how to get your ex boyfriend back and this is exactly what the answer to that question is.  The more you pester your former love, the more they will pull away from you.  If you ever want to see them back in your life as that special someone, you need to give them breathing room and make them realize just how desirable you are.  If they don't make that realization, you will never have that connection with them again.

What's the best way to help them along to this realization?  Really, it is just to make yourself into a person that is very desirable.  The good news here is that since your ex by definition already had to have been in a relationship with you before, they must find you desirable on some level.  So the only work you need to do is make sure that you live generally happily and that you are warm and outgoing to others when you are in the presence of your ex.  The more they see that you seem to have adjusted healthily to life without them, the more likely they are to want to be in your life again.

The same is true for when you manage to get a date with your ex once more.  Many people at this point would be tempted to shift all the way back into relationship mode.  That is a disaster that you must avoid at all costs.  Continue with the plan and you'll have the best chance of producing the results that you want.  This is not a sure method for getting your ex lover back, but it is definitely the one that has the best odds of working.
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Saturday, September 26, 2009

How To Get Your Ex To Fall Back In Love

The bad news, when it comes to finding out how to get your ex to fall back in love, is that your ex really hates you right now because they've dumped you.  Therefore, you are going to need to be very delicate about getting them back to the place they were at when they were in love with you.

However, the good news is that since you are trying to get your ex-lover to fall back in love with you, by definition they must have fallen in love with you the first time around.  The good news from that is that since they have fallen in love with you once already, there is definitely a chance for them to be able to do it again.

But how do you get them to go from that theoretically realization to actually making it happen?  That is not as easy.  However, you need to fight the urge to yell and scream at them while pressuring them back into the relationship.  This is how most people would react and it is definitely the bad way of doing things.  Even if it ends up working in the end, you'll be getting into an unhealthy relationship that likely won't end well for you or your ex.  If you really care about them, you shouldn't want that for them.

One of primary things that you should do in order to get them back to the place where they were in love with you is show them the person that you were.  Chances are good that you changed from the person they fell in love with to the person they dumped.  You need to rediscover the person inside you that they fell in love with and show them that person whenever you see them around.  This may seem a bit obvious, but it is definitely something that can work if you carry it through to its end.  It is an obvious strategy, but one that is difficult to accomplish.

Pride and stubbornness are two things that will do you in when you are learning how to get your ex to fall back in love.  If you cling to the old arguments, you are sunk before you begin.  This is especially true if some of those arguments are the ones that led to the breakup in the first place.  All of that needs to be put aside if you are serious about once again winning the affections of your ex.

Will this plan guarantee that you will be able to rediscover the love that your ex had for you?  No it will not.  But then again, there is no plan out there that can actually do this for you.  What this plan will do is allow you the best chance of reconnecting with your ex.  It will peel everything that your ex disliked about you when they dumped you away and reveal the person underneath that they fell in love with.  There is no better plan for trying to win them back.
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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

What To Do When You Miss Your Ex

Do you miss your ex?  Are you having trouble moving on?  Here are seven strategies to pursue when you miss your ex.

1.    Decide that it is over.  As long as you think there is a chance to get back together, you will continue to experience feelings of missing your ex girlfriend or boyfriend.  If you practice strategies like texting or phoning them trying to catch them off guard, you will continue to keep the feelings alive.  When you miss your ex, try one of the other strategies presented here.

2.    Get rid of all of their stuff.  Do an exchange where you give them their stuff and they give you yours.  Don't hold on to physical items for sentimental reasons, it will just remind you of how much you miss your ex.  If there are small things that you don't give back (such as a tooth brush or a comb) throw them away.  You don't need the constant reminders.

3.    Write them a letter, then burn it.  One reason why you continue to miss your ex is because you haven't gotten them out of your system.  So, write a letter pouring out all of your feelings about the relationship and the break up.  When you have released your emotions, then get rid of the letter.  There is something emotionally satisfying about watching your words go up in smoke.

4.    Reconnect with your friends.  Sometimes when you get in a hot and heavy relationship, your ties to friends and even family wither.  If this is the case, reconnect with your friends.  Redevelop relationships that you have let simmer.  Your friends and family love you even if your ex doesn't anymore.

5.    Make new friends.  One of the reasons you miss your ex is because he or she took up so much of your time.  Now, in addition to the intense emotional void you are feeling, you have time on your hands.  Fill that time with new activities or interests.  Take a class at the local university's extension program.  Learn to do the tango.  Join a co-ed softball team.  Volunteer to clean up the park through an environmental program.  When you keep busy, you will find that closing the time void also helps you close the emotional void.

6.    Get a pet.  A dog, cat, or other pet can help you reconnect to what is real.  A pet needs your attention and love.  A pet can also give you love.  When you miss your ex, you can reach out for a pet who loves you.

7.    Start dating other people.  The world moves on.  There are lots of other fish in the sea.  Once you reconnect with your friends, start new activities, and even start to walk the dog, you will begin to see all of the opportunities you have with the opposite sex.  Don't worry that a first date has to lead to a complicated relationship when you are not ready for one.  Just go out and enjoy yourself.  Soon, you will stop feeling that you miss your ex so much.

Follow these seven steps and you will soon find that you are not saying you miss your ex at all!

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Monday, July 20, 2009

Relationship Advice for Men Look at Evolution to Find a Mate

petunia artImage by Steve took it via Flickr


What is the best relationship advice for men? What should men know if they want a relationship to work for the long haul?

Probably the single biggest piece of relationship advice for men is to stop listening to what women say they want and start observing what women actually display that they want.

How do they display what they want? It is as simple as observing what kind of men they choose.

Women say “I want a man who listens to me.” They choose the man who dominates the conversation. Women say, “I want a guy with a good sense of humor.” They date the guy who has money.

Why do women say they want one thing but actually go out with a guy who is just the opposite? The answer to that question lies in the subconscious motivators for getting together. And, therein lies my relationship advice for men.

The historical, biological reason for men and women to get together is to propagate the species. In other words, just because getting pregnant may be the last thing on her conscious mind, when she evaluates a man at the subconscious level, she’s still looking for a good papa for her children.

Is the good dad someone who listens to her? No, it is someone who will provide for her children. And, the person who can provide for her children is someone who has the confidence to bring home the bacon.

Women need men who can be good providers. While a man can produce thousands of sperm on repeated occasions throughout their adult lives, even into their 90’s, women have about 400 chances of producing a baby. As a result, they are looking for a man who can provide longevity and stability for their babies.

A man who tells a women he is a lawyer and not a paralegal will have a better chance of landing her. That is because she perceives that a lawyer is a better provider for her future children.

But having a good income is not enough. A woman needs to perceive that a man is generous with his resources and will provide for her children. That is why women place such a high value on gifts such as jewelry.

It may also be why the engagement ring must be such a large purchase. When you ask a woman to marry you, you give her a ring, not just because it is traditional and romantic, but because it is a tangible display that you can provide for her and her children.

Further, even though modern humans make money more from their brains than their brawn, women are still programmed to think of strength equaling the ability to provide. That’s why, even when there is evidence to the contrary in the form of a tax return, the woman is hardwired to choose the lineman over the computer geek.

So, the biggest piece of relationship advice for men is to figure out what women need from an evolutionary point of view and give it to her.
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Sunday, July 19, 2009

How A Rebound Relationship Can Work In Your Favor

a special rose for a special dayImage by Marlis1- via Flickr

If you have broken up with the love of your life and she is in a rebound relationship, how do you get her back?

A rebound relationship is one where she is dating someone else to get over you. Rebound relationships keep people from having to deal with the emotions of breaking up. They’re used to help people move on from a real love.

And that’s the key to getting your ex back. She’s in a rebound relationship to deal with losing you.

It does not matter why she lost you. It doesn’t matter if it is your fault or hers. It doesn’t even matter who actually called the relationship off. What matters is that you have a real love.

Because virtually all relationships founded on real love can be saved.

If she’s in a rebound relationship, she will be focusing on what is wrong with your relationship. If you were a “good guy” she’ll probably be hanging out with a “bad boy.” If you were into philosophy, he’ll be watching Monday Night Football. Or, vice versa.

The fact that she is actually focusing on the differences in your styles is actually good for you for two reasons. Her attention is still focused on you even when she’s with the new guy. And, it gives you a chance to see what she’s looking for.

If she’s with someone as different from you as possible, it means that she was missing something in your relationship. You can use the time she’s with rebound man to improve yourself.

Let the rebound relationship run its course. Because, as she spends time with the new guy, she’ll start to see the flaws in him. After a month or so with rebound man, you’ll start to look pretty good.

That’s why you don’t want to crawl back to her right away. Let her develop the idea that she misses the good things in the relationship. When she’s ready to make a move, be magnanimous. Welcome her back graciously. Be a new and improved boyfriend, but don’t do the chasing.

Here are some specific steps to take when your ex is in a rebound relationship:

· Don’t try to convince her that you are the love of her life. Let her discover this on her own.

· Don’t apologize profusely. If you did something wrong, you can say you’re sorry. Once. But move on. She knows the real reason she loves you.

· Don’t make promises to change. You are who you are and that’s who she fell in love with.

· Don’t try to make her see that it wasn’t your fault. She will come to appreciate that over time – but only if you haven’t made her invest energy in defending her position that it was your fault.

· Never, ever beg her to take you back.

When you ex starts going out with someone just after you break up, she’s in a rebound relationship. You can make up with her and get back together. Don’t despair. The rebound relationship is a sign that she’s still in love with you.
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Saturday, July 18, 2009

7 Steps on How to Save a Relationship

Daisy, Daisy....Image by law_keven via Flickr

Jim works long hours and Lisbet doesn’t feel he is there for her. Lisbet spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and Jim feels that she doesn’t have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here’s how to save a relationship.

First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving. While almost every relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work. Because if a partner has opted out and doesn’t want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.

Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.

Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a relationship. One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups. In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem. For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse. While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship. If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you haven’t dealt with the core issue.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can save the relationship.

Once you have identified the core problems, you can begin to share your thoughts. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partner’s concerns. Hold your partner’s had when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner talks about things that hurt you remember that he or she is not doing it because he or she wants to hurt you. Rather it is because they want to improve the relationship.

Once you have detailed the problems in your relationship, create an action plan to solve them. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. If you don’t spend time together like you used to, plan a date night every week. Take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together each Wednesday. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.

Finally, you should realize that saving a relationship is an ongoing process. You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back. There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward. Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.

Is your relationship worth saving? If so, I’ve described in this article how to save a relationship.
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Wednesday, May 6, 2009

How to Get My Ex Back When He's Moved On

T

broken heart seriesImage by tony sak via Flickr

Have you lost your boyfriend, and are now asking for help on "how to get my ex back when he's moved on'? Don't bother moping, because what you have lost does not mean you have lost it forever. Here are some quick and simple tips on relationship advice for learning how to get your ex back even if he has moved on to another woman and no longer appears to be interested in associating with you.

1 - The first step to getting the man of your dreams back is finding a way to convince him that he still wants you. Unless he really, really does not want anything to do with you, then there are a number of options that you can employ from this point on.

2 - One of the most advantageous things that you can do is simply to be his friend. Make a really good friend to him, showing him that you understand him and that you can be around him without creating any drama. Show him that you can joke around with him and have a healthy friendship with him. When the drama and stress of the relationship and breakup have subsided, he may realize that he wants you again.

3 - When you communicate with your ex boyfriend, be sweet and kind to him but don't be afraid to have a little bit of attitude. You are going to want him to want you, but you're also going to want to give him the feeling that he cannot have you just yet. While playing games is not the best way to go, you do not want give an air of hard to get, making him more interested in the process.

4 - You should be playing a little bit hard to get, but you also want to make sure that he knows you are available. You shouldn't completely rule out the concept of flirting and hanging out with friends, because drumming up a little bit of jealousy never hurt anyone - But it is important that you play it safe because if he doesn't think you are available, he probably will not find the motivation to pursue you.

5 - Avoid acting desperate at all costs. If you act desperate, your ex boyfriend will under estimate you. You are going to want to play things cool, letting him know that you are okay with everything that has happened, and that you are willing to move on. If you act desperate, things won't work out the way you are intending them to, so avoid doing this at all costs.

6 - Any time that you know he is looking at you, or if you feel like he is looking at you, look at him out of the corner of your eye. This sidelong glance will let him know that you are paying attention to him, but in a mysterious "you can't have me" kind of way.

7 - Casually remind him of some of the best times that you have had together. These good memories will help him to remember how good the two of you used to be together. Don't bring up any bad memories, because it will only hurt his bad side, which will not do you any good.

As you can tell these are simple and down to earth suggestions which will provide just a few of the steps for learning "how to get my ex back when he's moved on'. Once again follow your heart but use your brain to discover other steps which could be effective.

The Magic of Making Up - Click Here!


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Saturday, May 2, 2009

Can I Get My Ex Girlfriend Back

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If you’re wondering, “Can I get my ex girlfriend back?” then the breakup probably wasn’t so devastating that you think the relationship can’t be saved. You’ll have to hope she feels the same way. If any hurt was caused during the split that you should apologize for, now’s the time to say you’re sorry. Being sorry and sincerely showing it is a good first step.

Can I get my ex girlfriend back by showing my sensitive side?

Well, there’s no guarantee you’ll get back together, but the odds tilt more and more in your favor when you do things right. Show her how much you miss her, and how sorry you are. Just pay attention to what she does. If your gestures of sorrow only make her angry—she throws away the roses or something dramatic like that, for example—change your tactics until you find that something she responds to.

If flowers or cards frustrate her, for example, maybe that’s because it’s easy to pick up the phone and order flowers or buy a card someone else wrote. Try putting yourself in her shoes and try to figure out something more appealing. Buy a blank card and write your own verse in it. It doesn’t have to rhyme, in fact it’s better if it doesn’t. Try to honestly express how you feel. Or pick flowers and present her with a bouquet you put together yourself.

A common complaint among women is that men aren’t thoughtful. Were you thoughtful during the relationship? Now you might be wondering, can I get my ex girlfriend back by being thoughtful? Not necessarily, but it’s one more step toward your goal of getting her back. Every positive thing stacks up, making it easier and easier for her to come back to you. Don’t expect things to happen right away, though.

If you spent your relationship rarely doing thoughtful things, or you only did them in the beginning, she’ll probably doubt the things you do now. Just be patient, and keep up your efforts. Don’t appear frustrated or angry. Do the thoughtful things because it feels good to make her happy, not because you’re working toward a goal.

Can I get my ex girlfriend back by dating other women?

If it’s been a long time since the breakup, and you’re still working on being thoughtful, a casual date seems harmless and may make her wish she was your date, but go too far and it could backfire.

Can I get my ex girlfriend back if she has a boyfriend?

The odds are against it, but if you can show her that she’ll be happier with you than the new boyfriend you’ll have a good chance. Being thoughtful will go a long way toward showing her that. Even if it seems hopeless, don’t give up.

If it appears she’s moved on, still send her a card you wrote just wishing her a great week. But don’t look as if you have any expectations. Your thoughtfulness might really impress her.

One other thing my friend, the points made above, are only just one step in the equation of getting your true love back. The important thing is to have a step by step plan that will lead you in your heartfelt pursuit.

Frankly, that's what I did when my true love dumped me. I followed a plan authored by T 'Dub' Jackson. When my cause was almost hopeless and I was dieing inside, it hauled me up by my bootstraps and helped me get my life's love back. It's called "The Magic of Making Up" and you can check it out at: Click Here!

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Thursday, April 30, 2009

How can I Get my Ex Back with a Confident Attitud

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Although a breakup with a boyfriend or with a girlfriend can be really depressing, it does not need to mean that the relationship is over. Even if the breakup should suddenly leave you feeling confusion and loneliness, you may still feel really eager to heal the wounds and jump right back in to that relationship with your ex. If you are asking yourself "How can I get my ex back?", then there are some things you need to know. If you learn how to react following a break up, and you become aware of how not to strain the relationship even further, then getting ex back will be easier than ever.

It can seem hard to keep up a cheerful attitude throughout your day following a breakup, but it is believed by relationship experts believe that an optimistic and confident attitude can go a long way. Here are some of the ways that a confident attitude can answer the question "how can I get my ex back?"

Keep your confidence - If you are asking "how can I get my ex back?", then you should remain confident. Rather than going around feeling gloomy, try to find ways that you can keep yourself occupied and happy. Keep the depression out of your demeanor. Allow your ex boyfriend or girlfriend to know that you are strong and that you are more than capable of handling such an emotional situation, and also that you are capable of surviving on your own as well.

Remain socially active - If getting your ex back is your primary focus, surround yourself with well wishers, positive attitudes and good friends. Show your ex that people appreciate you, and that they love having you around. As more people begin to feel good about your presence in their lives, your ex will begin to see you in a completely new light. He or she will realize that yes, you are a good person that they simply cannot afford to let go of. This is one of the best ways to let your ex notice you in a new light.

Maintain a good appearance - Another solution to "How can I get my ex back?" is not to let your appearance reflect your situation. You need to pay attention to every detail of your looks, including your clothes, your make up, your hair, your stride, your shoes and even your voice. It can be hard to act happy or to take care of yourself following a bad breakup, but this is one of the best ways that you can let your ex know that you are doing just fine, and do not need to beg for his or her sympathy. You are going to get back together like adults who are mature and responsible if you are going to get back together at all.

For more good information Click Here!


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Monday, April 27, 2009

How Can I Get Back Together With My Ex Girlfriend Today

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Sometimes when a relationship comes to an abrupt end, either one or both parties involved may still be in doubt that the end is really the end, and this is especially true when a relationship is new. Some men simply cannot accept the fact that their girlfriend walked away. Resultingly, they find themselves still hoping she'll still be there in the morning and that it was all a dream. Are you asking "How can I get back together with my ex girlfriend", it is important that you create a plan regarding how to do it.

In order to get back together with your ex girlfriend, there are numerous steps to take. Here are some of the tips that you should keep in mind when working through this process.

- There is always a second chance for everyone, so it's not impossible for you to get back together with your ex girlfriend. But first, you should ask yourself some questions Do you still love her? Do you really want her back? Why? Are you trying to get her back because you don't want to be alone, or you don't believe you should have been dumped? If you are looking to get back with your ex for reasons other than love, you may be playing a dangerous game that would be better off avoided.

- Do not appear desperate or needy to your girlfriend if your priority is "how can I get back together with my ex girlfriend?" Although you may feel desperate, and you may really want her back, you absolutely need to control your emotions, keeping them to yourself. If you cannot help them, then it may be wise to talk to your friends or family so you can cry your heart out where she cannot see. Do not beg or cry in front of your girlfriend, however, and absolutely do not stalk her.

- Learn how to control your feelings, forgetting about self pity and instead working on the positive aspects of working things through with your ex. If you appear too needy, or if you come off as too desperate, she may end up avoiding you even more.

- Keep the communication lines with your ex open. She may have ended the relationship, but you just need to make her feel like communication lines are open and that you want to be civil. You do not have to be the one initiating the conversation, but you should be willing to say hello and have a conversation occasionally with her, keeping in touch casually.

- Above all else, analyze what went awry with the relationship. There must have been a problem that led to the end of the relationship, so find out what the problem was if you want to get back together with your ex. Find out what caused the arguments, of which of her needs weren't being met, and work on rectifying those issues.

A great book to read is Click Here!
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Sunday, April 26, 2009

5 Ways To Get Your Ex Back

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Relationships are fragile bonds that need to be built up and maintained in order to keep them healthy and allow them to flourish. Unfortunately, break ups do happen, and they are nerve wracking, stressful and frustrating. If you are involved in a relationship that breaks up, you may be thinking that you want to get back at your ex but is this really the best step to take? One of the most influential ways that you can actually get back at your ex will not only put your ex in an interesting predicament, but it may also repair the relationship by showing your ex how important you are and were to them. So not only are these 5 tips to get back at your ex but they are also excellent methods for getting your ex back as well.

1 - Be strong. No one needs the needy, and this saying applies very well when it comes to broken up relationships. You need to stop begging, clinging or exhibiting the behavior of someone who is feeling desperate. Let your ex think that you have moved on just fine without them by acting strong and moving on. When you've moved on, your ex will realize that they have not.

2 - Minimize communication. Closing the doors of communication may appear counterintuitive when your primary focus is to rekindle things, but it is one of the most important steps when getting back at your ex or getting your ex back. Take a break from your ex, close off communication, and let him or her stew for a little while without any contact. This will allow your ex to clear his or her mind and realize how valuable your relationship was.

3 - Be flexible. Do not be forceful with your ex, demanding that they move out, or pick their things up by a certain date. Be flexible, be a listener and a sympathizer. Your ex will be surprised when they see this side of you, and it may inspire them to build the lines of communication that were lacking when the breakup came into play.

4 - Get the heck out! This is no time for you to be alone. Call your friends and get out of the house. Develop a social network and enjoy some entertainment in your life. This may not mean you need to date, or even pay attention to the opposite sex, but you do need to be getting out and enjoying your time with your friends. Not only will this be therapeutic for you, but it will also help convince your ex that they lost a gem.

5 - Simply be yourself. There was a really good reason for why you and your ex had a relationship to begin with, so go back to being yourself and let your ex remember why they loved you in the first place. This renewed self perception of your own self will surely rub off on your ex as well.

For valuable information, Click Here!





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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Learn How To Get Back Together With My Ex Boyfriend

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Sacrifice and compromise are both critical parts in the give and take that goes hand in hand with any relationship. If you are asking "How can I get back together with my ex boyfriend?" then you are going to need to keep these things in mind.

Nothing is going to make mending a broken relationship simple, but some of the advice contained within this article can certainly make it a lot less difficult overall to give him a reason to want to come back to you. So while you may be obsessing with the all important question, "how can I get back together with my ex boyfriend?", what you need to be focusing on is rectifying the causes of failure; that led to the breakup to eliminate the tension and stress that brought the split on in the first place.

So, How can I get back together with my ex boyfriend, you ask?

When a relationship fails, you need to take that as an indication that something went wrong. If your boyfriend left you, then it was likely for one of two reasons: Either the relationship was becoming stale because there was not enough of you in it, or the relationship was getting too claustrophobic because there was too much of you in it. Either way, one of these causes is going to lead to relationship suicide. If you are asking "How can I get back together with my ex boyfriend", then you need to start looking at which of these led to the break up so you can act accordingly.

Whatever the issue is that chiefly contributed to the split, it was probably either something that you did, or something that you didn't do. It may be harsh to look at things this way, but that is simply how it usually works. The person who was broken up with either did, or did not do something and the person doing the splitting simply felt driven away. So now what happens, and how can you manage to get him to come back? The first step is to change whatever it was that drove him away in the first place.

You need to sit down and really take a hard look at your situation. What could have led to the breakup? Which of these things were your fault, and which were not your fault?

Rule out the ones that were out of your control, since they continue to be out of your control, and focus on the things that you did do wrong, the ones that you can in fact change. If your biggest problem is something that you were responsible for and that you could change, then there is a very good chance that you can still get back together with him, as long as you really are willing to make the necessary changes to appeal to him again.

When you can start focusing on the things you can change then the question of "how can I get back with my ex boyfriend" will no longer be a question. You will know.

For more insight, Click Here!
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