Friday, October 30, 2009

What Is The Best Way To Get A Woman Back

Few things in life suck as much as losing someone you love.  It's very hard to deal with and many people will do just about anything to find out the best way to  get a woman back.  If you want to get back with your ex, don't give up. It is possible and I'll show you how.

In order to get back with your ex you're going to need to think outside the box.  When most people are trying to get back with their ex they almost always do the wrong things. 

That is why listening to your friends might be the worst thing you can do because chances are they'll tell you to do the exact opposite of what you should really be doing. 

Here is a list of some Do's and Don'ts.  Follow this list and you will have a much better chance of getting back with your ex. 

DON'T S

1) Harass, badger, nag, or threaten.  No one likes to be pushed.  Don't chase after her.  She already gets the fact that you still care and you want her back, now it's time to back off a little bit and give her some space.  

2) Lock yourself in your house and never go out.  This is what many people do.  They go to work but other than that they just hide in a dark room.  

3) Hookup with someone else.  Not only is this a good way to lose your girlfriend for good, it's also unfair to the new woman.  You would just be using her to get over your hurt.  


DO'S

1) Give your woman some space.  Give her time to miss you.  She can't remember you fondly and miss you if you are constantly in her face.  This can be very difficult to do but it's one of the most important things to remember if you want her back. 

2)  Go out with your friends.  Try to have fun.  It will be hard, but it's very important not only for your mental health but also so that your ex will start to see you, again, as a fun loving person.  The way she saw you when you first got together. 

3) Be honest about whether or not the relationship is worth saving.  Not all relationships should be saved.  Also be willing to honestly admit whatever part you had in the relationship falling apart and be willing to make some changes to your behavior. 

Follow the steps I've listed above and you'll be much more likely to get a woman back.
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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Get Back Your Love In 3 Easy Steps

OK you're broken up because you've lost the love of your life and now you want them back.  But is it possible to get back your love?  If so, then how?  Let me show you...

I know it's a cliche, but it's true: breaking up is hard to do.  That's why people almost always do the wrong thing when they are going through a breakup.  They are hurt, angry and scared and they just react.  And that is where the trouble starts.

If you want to get back with your love you need to follow a few simple tips.  Following these tips won't always be easy but you'll have a much better chance of getting back together with your ex then you would if you don't follow them. 

1) Don't suffocate them.  Even though it's tough to keep your distance that is exactly what you have to do. Even when you want to scream at them that  they are  being stupid and they're throwing away a wonderful relationship you need to hold that in. 

You need to give your ex time to miss you. If you make them angry by pursuing them relentlessly you will lose them forever.  And this is exactly what most people do. 

2) Don't spend too much time worrying about them, concentrate on you.  Now would be a great time for you to take stock of you.  Decide what traits you have that might have contributed to the relationship falling apart and try to fix them. 

Remember, you aren't fixing them to get your ex back, you are fixing them because they need to be fixed and  you want to be the best person you can be. 

No matter what happens with your ex, whether you get back together with them or not, if you take this important step now you will grow as a person and that can only make your future relationships much better. 

3)  At some point the two of you will need to talk.  Don't do this right away even though that's what you'll want to do.  You both need time to let things settle down otherwise any conversation you have is likely to end up with crying, or screaming, or both.

Once a little time has gone by you both can realize that you miss each other and hopefully have an honest conversation about what each of you is feeling and where you'd like to go from that point on. 

Just remember this isn't about proving that you're right and they're wrong.  It's about trying to honestly evaluate and understand each other's point of view.  That is the only way you can build a solid relationship.

Following these 3 seemingly simple steps can really help you  get back your love.  It's not going to be easy but it's the only way to reconcile and build something strong for the future.
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Monday, October 26, 2009

How Do I Get Back With Ex Husband

From http://divorcerightstips.blogspot.com/

Divorce.  Yuck! Now that you've gone through that hell on Earth you may be starting to think that the whole thing was a huge mistake.  If you want to know how to get back with ex husband this article can help. 

If you went to a therapist after your divorce and asked how to get back with your ex one of the first things they would probably do is ask you why you wanted to take them back. 

That is a good question.  If you have had time to honestly evaluate your marriage and have come to the conclusion that you ended it too soon without trying hard enough to save it then that's one thing. 

But if you, like so many others, are just now facing the fear and uncertainty of being newly single and are starting to think being in a bad marriage is better than being alone you really need to  find some help to get over the feelings of loneliness and depression before you do something you'll regret. 

If you're positive that getting back with your ex is the best thing for both of you, here are a  few simple steps you can follow:

1) Try to talk to him.  Not yell or nag, but talk.  And listen.  Try to honestly and maturely discuss why the relationship ended.  What misunderstandings took you so far away from one another.  

If the two of you can honestly discuss how you're feeling, without recriminations, than you might actually see that you're not that far apart after all.  You have just been coming at it from opposite directions. 

2) Take some time to honestly evaluate what part you played in the deterioration of your marriage.  No one is ever completely blameless.  What was your part and are you willing to change whatever behavior it was that contributed to the breakup?

3) Try to find resources that will help the two of you communicate.  So many couples just have a hard time expressing themselves and listening to their partners.  If you can find a way to work around this you might have a shot at not only getting back with your ex but also of making your marriage what you'd truly like it to be. 

Divorce is one of the ugliest and most difficult things we can go through.  If you've come to the conclusion that yours was a mistake and you want to know how to  get back with ex husband then following these tips will be a good first step in the right direction.
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Thursday, October 22, 2009

How Can I Save Our Relationship- Is It Even Possible

I'm sorry.  If you're reading this you must be having a very rough time in your relationship.  I know how difficult that can be.  If you are asking, 'How can I save our relationship?" I do have some tips that might be able to make a difference for you and your partner.

There are a few things you have to consider very carefully and honestly first.  You have to decide why you want to save your relationship.  That might sound like a dumb comment to make but sometimes we cling to things that we should just let go.  We cling for the wrong reasons such as fear of being alone.  Before you invest too much time and emotion in trying to save your relationship first make sure that it should be saved.

Now that you've done your honest soul searching and  you've decided that your relationship is worth saving here are a few tips you can follow which should help:

1) It's not all about you.  So often in relationships one person tends to carry more of the burden.  They are the 'fixer'.  They are the ones who carry most of the emotional baggage.  If that person is you than you have to realize that you can't do it all.  If your relationship is going to be saved your partner has to be able, and willing, to meet you halfway.

2) Try to communicate without condemning or criticizing.  When a relationship starts to falter there are a lot of hurt feelings and frustrations from both parties.  These hurts can build up into a huge wall of resentment.  That wall is very tough to tear down.  It will take a lot of time, patience, and open communication.

If the two of you aren't good at communicating you might need to find resources such as a book or counseling, that can help you work on your communication skills.

3) Own it.  If you've screwed up you need to be a mature adult and admit your mistake and apologize for it.  This is key.  Remember in step 2 when I talked about resentments building up? You can do a lot to ease those resentments if you just own up to your mistakes and offer a sincere apology for the hurt you may have caused.  To someone who loves you and wants to make things work this will be a very sweet sound.

Follow these 3 steps and you will be well on  your way to answering the question " how can i save our relationship?".  Remember, the problems didn't spring up overnight and they're not going to go away overnight either.  But if the two of you are willing to work together you can get back the loving, fulfilling relationship you both want.
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Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Can Positive Thinking Get My Boyfriend Back

After going through a difficult breakup most people would be willing to try just about anything to stop the pain and get their love back.  If you have done everything you can think of to do and are now wondering, 'how to get back with ex husband?", then this article is for you.

There has been a lot of talk recently about the effects of positive thinking and how it can impact your daily life.  Using this process to get back with your boyfriend seems like a logical next step.  But it isn't the do all, end all you may have heard.  There is more to it than just the thinking part.

To successfully use positive thinking to make the desired changes in your life you have to remember that it takes two steps: picture what you want, and take specific action to make that want a reality. 

Just sitting around day dreaming about getting your boyfriend back won't do it.  But thinking about getting your boyfriend back while you take positive steps to make it happen will be more likely to work. 

So what positive steps should you be taking?  Usually this is where most people mess up, they take a lot of action but it's all the wrong kinds of action. 

You don't want to constantly text, email and call your ex.  That won't accomplish a thing except perhaps a restraining order.  What you want to do is leave it alone.  

I know this sounds wrong, but it's not.  No one is attracted to a clingy, weepy, desperate person and your ex won't be either.  You need to take a step back and spend some time working on  you.  Don't change who you are to get your boyfriend back, but honestly analyze any areas in your life that could use  a little change of attitude.  This is for you not for him. 

The beauty of this is that you make yourself into a better person all the while giving him time to miss you and remember why he fell in love with you in the first place. 

That way no matter what happens, whether you get back together or not, you will have grown as a person and will have more to offer whomever you find yourself in a relationship with. 

Can positive thinking get my boyfriend back?  Yes...sort of.  Just remember that positive thinking is only step 1 in a 2 step method.  Use both steps to have the absolute best chance of accomplishing your goals.
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Sunday, October 18, 2009

What Are The Most Effective Get Him Back Secrets

 If you're going through a breakup that you don't want you might be wondering how you can get back with your ex.  Are there really any "get him back secrets" and if so, what are they?

If you are looking for some relationship secrets I've got good news and I've got bad news. 

The bad news is that there aren't, at least as far as I've ever heard, any secret techniques to get back with your ex.  There are no secret potions or love spells or magic tricks that will bring your ex back crawling on his hands and knees just pleading with you to take him back. 

The good news is that you don't need secrets.  All you need is an easy to follow, simple step by step "road map" that you can use to reconcile with your ex.  If you find a good plan and follow it, even though it may be hard sometimes to stick to, the results that you get might have you believing that it was magical after all!

If you truly want to get back with your ex the first thing you need to do, even though this is going to sound weird, is to stop talking to him.  If you are constantly contacting him this will likely backfire for a few reasons:

1) He won't be able to miss you.  You want him to start to doubt his decision to end the relationship.  He needs to miss the times you spent together and the things you did.  If you're constantly trying to contact him how can he miss you?  

2) If you won't leave him alone you are just becoming an annoyance.  That is not how you want him to think of you, is it?

Another thing you have to avoid is the tendency to want to fix the relationship and change yourself so he will come back.  While it is important for you to understand what qualities you have that might need some work, you should never change who you are just to accommodate someone else.  

If the two of you aren't compatible then it's time for you to move on, no matter how painful it might be.  It's simply not healthy for you to reinvent yourself for every relationship you have and it is a good way to find yourself in one abusive relationship after another. 

And last, but not least, communicate.  That doesn't mean cry, nag, beg or threaten.  That means to have an adult conversation where you can openly and honestly explain to him how you're feeling.  It's also important that you let him tell you how he is feeling too.  This isn't the time to get angry or upset over what he tells you.  This needs to be a 'safe zone' for both of you to honestly express yourself. 

If you think that your relationship really is worth saving and you want " get him back secrets" than follow the list above.  This is an honest and proven way to reconcile with your love.
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Friday, October 16, 2009

Do I Need Free Love Spells To Get Him Back

If you've just broken up with your boyfriend or husband and are at the end of your rope trying to get him back you might be at the point where you would consider anything.  If you're asking the question:" Do I need free love spells to get him back?" then you really need to read the rest of this article.

Before you start dabbling in magic there might be a simpler and easier way to go.  Just communicating with him in a calm and rational manner might be all it will take.  At this point in the game an actual  'old fashioned' written letter sent in the mail might be a good way to let him know where you are coming from. 

Texts are just too impersonal.  It's hard to truly explain how you feel with an electronic delivery system.  But sending a letter handwritten by you willl surely get his attention. 

For the letter to be effective you have to make sure that you keep a few points in mind:

1) Don't be negative.  This isn't the time for guilt trips, venting  your anger, or whining about your broken heart.  This is the time to honestly own whatever part you played in the breakup of the relationship.  

Even if most of the blame is his you still had something that you did wrong and regret.  Explain why you did what you did.  Don't try to justify it, just explain what you were thinking at the time and why you took the actions you took. 

2) Don't promise that you'll change.  You should be honest with yourself about anything that you need to work on but that's it.  You arn't going to change yourself and remake yourself for every boyfriend you have.  That's not healthy. But you can and should work on improving yourself.  And you can tell him what you plan to work on and why. 

3)  Talk a little about your life now, without him.  Don't brag about a new guy and try to make him jealous and don't sound all down and whiny.  Just tell him something good.  Not all the details but  just enough to pique his curiosity.  Make sure you end your letter with something positive, something that reminds him of the wonderful, fun loving women he fell in love with.  

You don't have to resort to free love spells to get him back all you need to do is find a way to remind him of how great you are and how great the two of you used to be.  If you can do this and intrigue him all over again you will have a better chance of getting back with your ex.
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Thursday, October 15, 2009

Do You Want To Save Your Marriage

I have one question for you: do you want to save your marriage?  If the answer is yes, you have a hard road ahead of you.  But, before you start down that path, you have to answer this question in the affirmative.

Take a hard look at the state of your marriage.  Is this the person you want to be with in five years?

If not, you don't need to read any further.  Just go down to the closest divorce attorney.

Still with me?  Good.  I'm going to show you how to save your marriage.

Once you have decided that your marriage is worth saving, you can start to do the work that is necessary.  Don't even think about going to the divorce lawyer any more.  You've made the commitment to stick with your relationship.

Now that you have put divorce out of your mind, accept that there will have to be changes in the relationship.  If you want the relationship to work more than your partner does, then you are the one who is going to have to do the most changing.  That's a simple fact.  It is like the person who has the bigger aversion to messiness usually does the most cleaning around the house.  The person who wants the relationship to work more will have to do the most changing.

You have to be prepared to talk more too.  Set aside time to get to know your partner once again.  If he or she has hobbies that they are willing to share with you, get involved even if you are not all that into darts or scrap-booking.

If your partner is willing to agree to it, marriage counseling may be what you need to save your marriage.  A relationship counselor or therapist will be able to look at your marriage from the outside, ask probing questions, and get you to open up to each other.

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship.  Once you have the idea out of your head, you will be able to work on what is real and what is good.  These are the standards you should be applying to your marriage.  

Do you want to save your marriage?  Good.  But know the hard work lies ahead.

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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

How To Save My Marriage

Do you wonder "how to save my marriage?" This article tells you how to save your marriage.

First, you need to identify the trouble in your relationship.  Some common troubles include:

·    Money concerns
·    Child rearing difficulties
·    Lack of sex
·    Lack of communication
·    Loss of identity

And, of course, there are many others.  You may discover that there is one main problem or you may identify several smaller problems that are eating away at your marriage.  

When you identify the problem or problems that are at the root of your marriage troubles, you will be able to move on to the next step which is close, personal interaction.

In this step, you will need to be open to extensive conversation.  If you have not had a lot of open communication during your marriage, you may want to consider counseling in order to facilitate the personal interaction that is key to this step.  

If you really want to save your marriage, you will set aside time to work on your marriage issues every single day.  You could set aside some time like after the children go to bed or you could decide to take a walk after dinner every day for just the two of you.  But, you should plan to get back in touch with each other.  A daily habit of quality time with your spouse is very important.

Take some romantic time each week.  For some couples, this means reinstating a date night every week.  On Tuesdays, for instance, you get a sitter and go out for a picnic or walk around the mall.  As you can see, this doesn't have to involve wine and roses every week, but a romantic time that you can look forward to all week is essential.

As you spend time together being romantic and discussing your problems, you must have an open mind toward what your partner is telling you.  You need to understand that a lot of the problems in your marriage are caused by " get this" you!  Until you really listen to your partner, you are not going to be able to effect the kind of personal change necessary to save your marriage.

You need to have faith in your partner.  You need to give him or her the benefit of the doubt.  You need to believe that the marriage still can and will work.  You also need to believe that your partner is still essentially the same person he or she was when you married them.  If you cannot have faith in your partner and in your marriage, you might as well give up now.

Finally, you have to be open to forgiveness.  If your partner has made mistakes, even major ones, you must be able to forgive.  If you insist that there are things that cannot be forgiven, there is no hope for your marriage.  

Everyone makes mistakes.  Some people make big mistakes.  If that person makes a genuine apology, which includes acts of contrition and an effort to change, they deserve forgiveness.

This article gave you answers to that perplexing question, "how to save my marriage".
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Monday, October 12, 2009

I Miss My Ex Boyfriend

After you break up with a guy, there is a period of loneliness.  Not only are you missing the time that you spent with him, but there is also a piece of your heart that walked out the door when he did.  If you are saying “I miss my ex boyfriend,” here are some ways to get past the feeling.

There are two steps to getting over an ex.  The first is to bring closure to the relationship and the second is to start on the next phase of your life.

Closure is the psychological term for ending a phase of one's life.  There are many things you can do to stop saying "I miss my ex boyfriend".

First of all, you should determine that he doesn't want you back.  As long as you think that there is a chance you can get back together, you will not begin to heal.  

To that end, exchange all of the physical possessions you have.  Don't keep his toothbrush in your bathroom or hold on to his leather jacket.  If you have left clothes or other possessions at his house, pick them up.  

If either of you owes the other money, pay it back as soon as possible.  

Don't contact him and don't let him contact you.  Perhaps you can be friends in the future, but right now, you need time to separate your emotional lives.  If you give in and answer his phone calls, emails, or texts, you are just letting a wound fester.

If you find yourself saying "I miss my ex boyfriend", sit down and write about it.  Write a letter to him sharing your feelings about the relationship and the break up.  But don't send it to him.  Throw it away, or even better, burn it.  This will help you bring closure to the relationship.

After you've gotten over the initial hurt of the break up, start putting yourself out there again.  It might feel awkward at first, but you are going to have to face life as a single person sometime.  The sooner you get back on the scene, the sooner you will meet someone new.

If your ex took up a big part of your life, you will want to find new past times.  This may mean reconnecting with your girlfriends.  Or, it may mean going out and finding new friends.

One of the best ways to fill the space an old boyfriend took up is to start something new.  Join a class or a co-ed sports team.  See if your local book store has a monthly book club.  Start going to church again.  

While it may be hard to get started on the social scene again, you will find that you miss your ex boyfriend much less when you are engaged in activities you enjoy.

When you have the opportunity to, start dating again.  Even if the first guy isn't someone you can see spending the rest of your life with, accept his invitation to dinner or the movies.  As you get back into the routine of dating, you will be able to find a man who can appreciate and love you.

Whenever you hear yourself thinking 'I miss my ex boyfriend', do something that either brings closure to the relationship or propels you to move forward in your life. 

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Saturday, October 10, 2009

The Best Way To Save Marriage Embrace Conflict

From Divorce Rights

In many states, all a husband or wife has to do to end the relationship is state to the court that there are "irreconcilable differences" and the court will grant the divorce.  But, in any marriage, there should be irreconcilable differences.  The best way to save marriage is to embrace the conflict that is inherent in a close partnership between two people.

We often think of divorcing couples as the ones who screamed at each other all of the time.  But if these couples can communicate their needs through elevated voices, they are actually doing better than the couple that avoids all conflict at the cost of expressing their needs and beliefs.

It is these silent couples who need to save marriage through embracing conflict.

While no one is suggesting that emotional and verbal abuse is a good thing for a relationship, couples who don't acknowledge that there are problems and differences are actually more likely to split up according to Dr. John Gottman, a researcher who runs the Love Lab.

So, if you want to save a marriage, you need to learn how to communicate and express your differences.  Here are some tips for communication in marriage:

·    Allow enough time for proper communication.  If you are not spending enough time together to air your differences and share your strengths, you will find your relationship is in trouble.  Work on building couple's time back into your life.  For instance, make a point of eating dinner together several times a week or going out on a date very week.

·    Really listen when your partner speaks.  It is amazing how much we tune out our partners.  He or she may be telling you what you need to know.  But, if you are not listening, it is all in vain.

·    Find out why your partner is annoyed.  When your husband or wife is being particularly grumpy, find out what is really going on.  Sometimes, it may be that you have done something that has annoyed them.  Other times, it may be that something completely unrelated has occurred.  But you won't know unless you ask.

·    Get inside his or her world.  As couples begin to drift apart, they start to live in separate worlds.  When you make an attempt to get inside his or her world, you may just save the marriage.

·    Stop judging.  Express what needs you have and listen to your spouse's needs.  But, don't be quick to judge or criticize.

·    Be honest.  One of the biggest problems for people who don't like conflict is that they can't be honest about what they want and need.  When you start to express honest opinions about things, you will begin to save marriage.

Marriage is hard work.  But, if it is worth it to you to save marriage, you will do the work.  That means more communication, and yes, more conflict.

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Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Relationships - Break Up To Make Up

This is your guide: Relationships - Break Up to Make Up.  The break up may be just the first stage in getting back together with an ex.

If you had been dating for any length of time, you and your ex had a lot invested in the relationship.  You obviously loved and cared for each other.  But something went wrong and one of you decided to call it quits.  How you handle the relationship break up may have a lot to do with whether you can ever make up.

If you are the one initiating the break up, try to do it with love and compassion.  Whether you are truly calling it quits or just wanting a time out, remember that this is a person who has been important to you and you have a responsibility to take his or her feelings into account.

It's generally best to tell the person that you want to break up in a public place.  That's because people are less likely to embarrass themselves if others are around.  Also, don't draw the break up out.  Just say your piece and leave.

Once you have broken up, leave the channels of communication open.  Be there for your ex when he or she needs you.  

Don't play games with your ex.  Some people suggest dating their best friend or flaunting a new date on your ex, but consider that if you ever make up, these things are going to haunt your new relationship.

If you have found that you want to get back together with your ex, consider the following:

· Tell them that you are interested
· Be interesting yourself - take up new activities and make new friends
· Try a new look - whether it is a new hair style or simply updating your grooming, your ex will notice.

Suggest that you meet your ex for lunch or some other non-romantic activity.  During this time, you can bring up the positive memories you shared.  You can also emphasize any changes you have made in your life.

If your ex gives you any indication that he or she is willing to give it a second try, don't assume that you can start right back where you left off.  Woo your boyfriend or girlfriend.  Go out on romantic dates.  Start by holding hands, not jumping into the sack.  

Also, give your relationship time to heal from the break up.  Don't assume that your ex's feelings weren't hurt by the cooling off period.

Continue improving yourself.  Don't fall into bad habits just because you've got your ex back.  Constantly strive to be the best boyfriend or girlfriend you can be.

That's your guide to Relationships - Break up to Make up.

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Monday, October 5, 2009

I Miss My Ex Girlfriend

When you find yourself saying "I miss my ex girlfriend", you need to find ways to move forward with your life.  No matter how bad the break up was, there is life after your ex.  Finding your way through the depression that follows the end of the relationship can be hard.  That's why you need to take concrete actions to move forward.

First of all, you need to work on bringing closure to the relationship.  Closure is the process by which you move on from a situation.  While you may find specific situations in which you say, "I miss my ex girlfriend", you will not be in this state all of the time.

Begin by definitively saying that the relationship is over.  As long as you think there is a chance that you can get your ex back, you will not be able to move on.  Healing begins with putting an end to the relationship.

Next, you need to physically close the relationship.  You do that by exchanging all of the possessions in the other's care.  Give her back the toothbrush and curling iron she kept at your house and ask her for the sweat shirt that she had borrowed for the long term.  If you owed each other money, settle up.

Once you have your possessions back, give yourself some physical space.  While you may want to remain friends with your ex in the long run, staying away in the short term will facilitate healing.  Don't call, text, or email each other.  If she tries to contact you, screen her out.  

And, don't show up at places she is likely to be.  You don't want to give her any opening to get under your skin.  Seeing her with another guy so soon will just prompt feelings of "I miss my ex girlfriend" all over again.

You may even need to change some of your social habits.  If you go to a small church, you might want to consider changing places of worship at least in the short term.  You may have to pick a new favorite bar or hang out as well.

When you start going new places, you will inevitably meet new people.  Some of these people will be female.  These new women are good prospects for dates.

While it may seem right now that you'll never want to date another woman, the truth is that the sooner you get back on the dating scene, the sooner you will begin to heal.

It may not be enough to just be available though.  Consider actively seeking out women.  Take a class at the local university's extension program.  Join a co-ed softball team.  Take up a new hobby.  All of these strategies will allow you to start meeting new women.

If a woman intrigues you, ask her out even if you can't picture yourself in a long term relationship with her.  A date is just a fun social experience, not a commitment.

Pretty soon, you won't be saying "I miss my ex girlfriend" nearly as frequently.  You will have moved on with your life.  

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Saturday, October 3, 2009

Get My Ex Back

Do you wonder "how do I get my ex back?"  This article will show you five different strategies to get my ex back.  These are not strategies that can be done in conjunction with one another.  Pick one path and stick to it.

The second path is to be needy.  This is not a recommended path.  When you are needy, you write lots of love letters, pester them with dozens of texts or emails, and call them at least five times a day.  Unless your ex is a real wimp, this will probably turn them off rather than get your ex back.

The alternative to being needy is the second path which is to be available.  If you have some hope that your ex will want you back after you have given them a little bit of space, your best strategy is simply to be available.  Answer their phone calls and emails, give them a shoulder to cry on, and don't harass them about getting back together.  It's okay to go on with your life and date other people during this period, but don't flaunt it in your ex's face.

If you follow the available path, you'll just show up places where your ex is likely to be hanging out.  You'll find occasional excuses to call your ex (but never more than once every few days).  

In this path, you will also send emissaries to him or his friends broaching a reconciliation.  

But if you don't think being available is going to work, you can choose the third path which is to be aggressive about other people.  If you choose the aggressive path, you are going to play on one of mankind's primal urges, namely jealousy.

This third path could also be called "date your ex's best friend" because that is one of the strategies on this path.

What you will want to do is make yourself your ex's dream girl (or guy) and then pursue his friends.  When you show up at places he or she hangs out, you will pay lavish attention to your ex's friends and none whatsoever to him or her.  

When you do land a date with your ex's friend, you should text your ex and ask him what kind of restaurant to make reservations at for your date.  Get in your ex's face with the fact that you are on the market.

As your ex sees that you are a valuable commodity, they will want you back.  Jealousy is a powerful human emotion.

Be aware that playing games like this could backfire.  If you invest a lot of emotion in "tricking" your ex into wanting you and he or she really is over you, you could hurt yourself badly.  Only you can decide whether this strategy is worth the consequences it may cause you.

So, there are three different paths to how to "get my ex back".



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Friday, October 2, 2009

Can Me And My Boyfriend Get Back Together

Many girls want to know, "can me and my boyfriend get back together?"  Well, part of the answer to that question depends on you and part depends on your ex boyfriend.  This video will look at the things you can do to make it more likely that you and your boyfriend can get back together.

First of all, you need to demonstrate that you have learned from past mistakes.  You should look at what didn't work the first time around and see if you can improve on it.  Did he complain that you spent too much time with your girl friends?  Then, plan to spend more time with him if you get back together.

The next thing you need to do is remind him of all of the good things in your relationship.  Who were you when you first got together?  Has anything changed?  For instance, when you got together were you a bubbly outgoing girl who had lots of things on your plate?  Then, as you got more involved with him, did you drop a lot of your activities?  Maybe he dropped you because you weren't as engaging as you used to be.

Put your hurt feelings aside and look at how you can support your ex boyfriend.  While he's just a friend now, by being there to support him, maybe you can turn the relationship back into something more.

If his friends were critical of you, that may have been the reason behind the break up.  Try to win his friends over as they have a great deal of influence on who he chooses to date.

One of the most powerful tools you have to get your ex boyfriend back is to reminisce about the good times you shared.  As you put the positive memories in his mind, he will feel more like getting back together with you.

Go to the places you used to go together and do the activities you used to do together.  Not only will this make it more likely that you will just "run in" to your ex boyfriend, you will also be developing the hobbies that he enjoys.  Also, if there was a pastime that he encouraged you to take up while you were in the relationship, you might want to consider doing it now.  It will signal to him that you have changed and have become even more interesting.

Always look your best.  You never know when you might run into him.  Guys are so much more visual that girls are.  So, your appearance matters.

Be a positive person.  Guys don't like depressed, whining girls.  Be positive and upbeat around all kinds of people, but especially your ex!

But, whatever you do, don't be too obvious that you are trying to get your ex boyfriend back.  The pressure will make him like you less, not more.  

You will notice that the advice I've given you here will make you a more attractive girlfriend whether it is for your ex or for a new guy.  That's because improving yourself will always get you a boyfriend.


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Thursday, October 1, 2009

Stop My Divorce

Divorces are at an all time high.  Sometimes it seems that it's easier to get a divorce than to get married. 

People get hurt in divorce.  The parties are forever scarred.  Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt.  Knowing this, you may be wondering "How do I stop my divorce?"

There are three steps to stopping a divorce.  

The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you've changed does not mean you really have changed.  If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it's not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.

If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways.  It is not enough to tell your partner that you're not stepping out anymore.  You will have to take concrete actions.  As an example, you may need to allow your partner to monitor your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis.  If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.

Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship.  For instance, if the wife's spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance.  If the husband's work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what.  At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life?  If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes.  But don't just give lip service to them.  Actions speak louder than words.

The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce.  Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage.  Telling your partner, "but I love you" in the heat of an argument will not win you any points.  When you say "I love you" at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say "I love you, BUT"  this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.

Use the powerful I love you message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument.  

You can't use logic or guilt to change your partner's mind.  Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument.  If you feel you must win, then you will lose.   

Finally, don't think that you can win an argument.  Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to prove they are right and their partner is wrong.  This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it's sure to fail.  Instead of arguing, solve the problem.  If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back.  

Are you wondering how to stop my divorce?  Start by following the stop my divorce advice I've laid out in this article.



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